Her Voice Blog

To say I love the Kate Spade brand would be an understatement. I’ve carried the Kelly-Green tote I purchased in Charleston as a briefcase for the past 3 years and can’t give it up despite the tattered straps.

My admiration for Kate Spade is fueled by my wonder for how she made simple things happy. Pens, gift enclosure cards, file folders, staplers, tape dispensers, pencil cups and a plethora of other “happy” products. She has made my desk a happy place to work.

But this post has a much deeper purpose.

It’s hard to be a female entrepreneur. REALLY DANG HARD. And when I heard the news that Kate Spade had apparently committed suicide in her Park Avenue apartment earlier this week, it stopped me in my tracks.

She is a woman who seemingly had it all and then some. How could an international success get that low?  As I began to think about my own entrepreneurial journey over the past 11 years I can see how it could happen. It’s easy to lose sight of why I started the business and what I hoped to accomplish. I get lost in my own head and begin focusing on the obstacles, failures and the flat-out fear that can be pervasive in the lives of entrepreneurs. And with children, aging parents and our tendency to keep things bottled up inside, it can make for a dangerous cocktail.

So, I decided to write a blog to warn female entrepreneurs – especially you newbies out there -- to take care of yourselves. Your mental health is just as important as your physical health.

Here are a few things I’ve learned along the sometimes very lonely, stressful journey that is the life of a female entrepreneur.

Giving Up Control

“For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and  not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” {Proverbs 29:11}

Why did I share that verse? Because most entrepreneurs are control freaks and the sooner you learn to get over yourself, find your own truth and figure out how you can serve others through your business, the better off you will be. Otherwise, we may find ourselves in the land of abundance, blessed beyond belief and completely suicidal because of the lies we tell ourselves.

 Keep Things in Perspective & Take a Mental Health Break

I am the Queen of Worst Case Scenarios and literally live them out in my dreams. I’m going to go broke and be forced to move in with my parents. I’m going to be single for the rest of my life. It’s been eleven years, but I’m pretty sure my business is doomed to failure if XYZ doesn’t happen within XYZ timeframe.

Girl, get a grip. We live in the most abundant nation in the world and unfortunately hyper-successful women who live on Park Avenue are still killing themselves.

It’s okay to take a break. You deserve to take some time to unplug and reset.

Find Your Tribe

There’s an old saying, “it gets lonely at the top.” I’d like to add to that. “It gets even more lonely when you’re at the top and experience setbacks.”

Find. Your. Tribe.

You need a few go-to people in your life who understand the ups and downs of entrepreneurship so you can air your dirty laundry and protect your sanity. I encourage you join a group of other business owners and executives. I’ve worked with a business coach and success coach for years and I honestly don’t know if I would’ve gotten this far without them.  We can’t do this entrepreneurial journey alone.

Kelly Fletcher is the CEO of Fletcher Marketing PR. Founded in 2008, the agency is focused on marketing to highly specific groups of women. Kelly is a strong advocate for female entrepreneurs.